No More Mr. Nice Guy

Wow. I just met with a couple of students here at my job, and I think I may be back to my old self.

Let me explain: I work at a university with students who've gotten in trouble due to use of alcohol or drugs. Normally, I'm fairly tough with these students, believing that if the whole experience can be just a little uncomfortable for them, they're less likely to repeat the actions that landed them in my office in the first place, since it's rarely actual addicts that I work with. However, when I found out I was pregnant this last time, and specifically after getting through the first trimester and feeling pretty hopeful that I might actually stay pregnant for once, I changed a little. I started being nicer, giving them the benefit of the doubt, and treating them like the normal, good kids that they typically are, and was all around less of a hard ass. To be fair, I probably let some of them off the hook a little more easily than they deserved, but hey, I was pregnant! All was right with the world! I'm going to Disneyland!

So, as my first full-time week back concludes, I realize that some of my edge has started to return. My beautiful baby boy is 4 months old, and more importantly, he's not here at the moment, so I guess it's ok to not be oozing with love 24/7. First, the students in question DON'T SHOW UP to a REQUIRED meeting with me, then when they do, it's without the homework I specifically asked them to return with. At least I ended our time together with a wish for both to have a nice weekend. Sigh.

Maybe I just need to get pregnant again. After all, it's for the students.

I'm back, maybe?

I used this blog previously to talk about being pregnant, and now that I have a four-month old, that topic has, um, ended. Andy and I use the www.babyrowan.wordpress.com to talk about him, and since I've had little else to talk about since his birth, that was sufficient. However, now I'm thinking maybe it's time I consider using this space again to talk about other aspects of my life. It's been so long since I've posted here that I doubt anyone else will actually see this, but that's ok.

I started back to work part time 2 weeks ago, and am full-time this week. I love my job, and am glad to be back, but I do miss the kid terribly. He frequently falls asleep around 7pm, so we really only have about 2 hours with him (awake) during the work week, and that's a huge decrease from what I'm used to.

My sister was in town visiting this weekend, and it was so nice to see her. I value my relationship with her more as we get older, and it seems easier for us to connect as adults than maybe it was as kids. She's one of my closest friends, and I'm glad Rowan's birth has encouraged us to spend more time together. Another good friend, Liz, will be visiting this weekend, and I look forward to that as well.

Ok, that's enough for my first go at this for a while, but I'll try to come back soon and explore the mom and non-mom parts of my life as time and motivation allow.

Thursday's the Day!

So, I'll be admitted to the hospital at 5pm tomorrow (Wednesday), and will be induced on Thursday. I'm still kind of in shock, but am very excited! Andy will be updating everyone on a new blog he's created, BabyRowan. That will likely be where I start posting as well, though it may be a while before I get to it.

Thanks to all who've been sending prayers and well wishes our way during this long and thrilling journey:).

This is it...

Today's my last day of work until September 16. It hasn't really hit me yet, but I'm sure it will soon. I'm at 38 weeks today, and am ready for this kid to arrive any time he's ready to. Everything's still just going wonderfully, though I am regretting my last-day-of-work dress, which makes me look even bigger than I actually am. We wear purple every Friday around here (yay, school spirit), and this dress makes me look like a massive grape. Of course, Andy felt this morning was an appropriate time to take pictures "so we can remember how big you were." Thanks, sweetie.

I'm looking forward to enjoying what will likely be the last weekend of relative peace and quiet with my hubby. We'll be celebrating our 7th anniversary on Monday. I feel lucky to have him as a husband, and am glad Rowan has him as a father.

Curiouser and curiouser...

I had the BEST appointment with the nurse practitioner today. For starters, I LOST a pound since last week, which hasn't happened since I've gotten through morning sickness. Then, she tells me my group B strep test from last week came back negative, which is great news. And THEN, she checks my cervix and finds that it's halfway thinned out (effaced), and I'm dilated 1cm. This apparently doesn't mean that I'm more likely to go into labor anytime soon, but obviously the closer I can get to effaced and dilated now, the less work I'll have to do in labor later, which is good news to me. And to top it all off, she said she actually touched the top of his head, to confirm that he is fact "dropped" and in the proper position. How freaking wierd is that...Of course, Andy immediately said that HE wants to touch Rowan's head, but since he's not a trained medical professional, I politely declined his request. He'll just have to wait, like everybody else:).

Time enough?

It's interesting that I SHOULD have about four more weeks until Rowan's arrival, but I've recently started to feel the pressure to get absolutely everything done and ready just in case he decides to arrive early. My good friend and former co-worker just gave birth to her son at 37 weeks and 2 days, and she and her husband were caught a little off-guard by it. I have about 2 weeks left to work for the year (which would put me at 38 weeks), and I'm really hoping I am able to get everything done, both at work and at home, before that time.

I told Andy last night that when I get to 37 weeks, I'd really like for our house to be cleaned and kept that way until the big day arrives, whenever that is. The last thing I want to worry about as I'm going into labor is having a dirty house to greet the family that may arrive here before I have a chance to get to it. This is unfortunate for my poor husband, since much of what needs to be done would be a big challenge for me given my current limitations, so this may be accomplished through use of a cleaning service; we'll see.

I had an ultrasound 2 days ago, and the little guy is currently weighing in at around 6 lbs; they're guessing that if I make it to June 6, he'll be around 8, which would be just perfect. He's in the position he's supposed to be in (head down, facing backward), and seems ready to go. The doctor assured me that she doesn't believe he'll decide to come before my next appointment with her on May 22 (she'll be out of town next week), and I'm hoping she's right.

We had our childbirth class last Saturday, and this did really help me feel a bit more comfortable with what lies ahead for us. With the recent arrival of little Luca (friend Kristen's new arrival), we decided to go ahead and get car seat bases installed in both vehicles, packed a couple of bags (one for Rowan and one for me, of course), made the "must call" list, and bought a stroller and baby monitor, which were 2 of the last items on our list. We'll continue to take care of the last few details, and I'm hoping maybe next weekend to have time to do some cooking in advance, stuff that can be put in the freezer and thrown in the oven for those times I don't feel like cooking (which is pretty well all the time anyways).

Before long, I think this blog is going to be dedicated to the trials that come with being a new mother. I can't believe we're nearing the end of this amazing leg of the journey...

Bright Sunshiney Days

I feel happy today. Happy and secure. Happy and secure and excited. I'm sure the glorious weather we're having currently is contributing to it. My itching has not disappeared, but it's less intense and thought-consuming than it was previously. I'm definitely in the "waddling" stage, and simple movements like getting in and out of the car are more of a challenge than they've ever been. All in all though, I'm feeling healthy and content.

I had a doctor's appointment today, and will continue seeing her every week until it's go-time. I've only gained 1 lb. in the last week, so I was able to avoid the fairly frequent lectures that she dishes out. For those of you who are curious, I've gained a grand total of 37 lbs. so far. Is that really so bad? Next week, I'll have my strep B test, she'll check my cervix (I assume to see if it's starting to prepare itself for the impending event), and will have an ultrasound. THAT is the part that Andy and I are both excited about. It seems strange, but we sort of MISS Rowan. We haven't gotten to actually lay eyes on him since I was at 19 weeks, and it'll be nice to check in and see what he's up to in there.

We'll take care of a few of the final details this weekend, including things like packing a bag, purchasing a stroller and maybe a laundry hamper for the nursery, and since I'm off work tomorrow I may try to find a couple of decent nursing bras. Apparently those things come in handy. Last weekend I bought a sleep shirt and a pair of maternity sweatpants, which are wonderful. Before I was pregnant, it never would have dawned on me that my loosest normal-person clothing would someday be WAAAY too small, but yep, it's happened. I'm still relying on Andy's generosity and willingness to share his clothing, but even his stuff is too small for me to be truly cozy much of the time. I tolerate things that "fit" for work, but when I get home, I want to be swimming in my clothing.

I miss my parents. Between my Dad's recent back surgery and my certainty that I shouldn't be traveling 6 hours away from my doctor at this point, it's not feasible for us to get together, and that sucks. I last saw them at Easter, and even though we don't normally get together more than once every few months, just knowing that we CAN'T makes it harder. I know they'll come down when Rowan arrives, and as anxious as I am for him to get here, and to see them, I hope he takes his time, so Dad has plenty of heal-up time before having to make the long trip.

I also miss my sister. You out there, Amanda? Nothing wrong with your back, so feel free to visit your Evansville-bound sister whenever you can...Just kidding; my husband is more than capable of keeping me company in the absence of far-off family members. I've been thinking about the trip we took to visit her a year ago when she was living in Arizona, and I want to go back! Again, just knowing I'm stuck here makes EVERYWHERE ELSE seem pretty attractive at the moment. I'll get to leave Evansville again someday though, right? Right?!