No More Mr. Nice Guy

Wow. I just met with a couple of students here at my job, and I think I may be back to my old self.

Let me explain: I work at a university with students who've gotten in trouble due to use of alcohol or drugs. Normally, I'm fairly tough with these students, believing that if the whole experience can be just a little uncomfortable for them, they're less likely to repeat the actions that landed them in my office in the first place, since it's rarely actual addicts that I work with. However, when I found out I was pregnant this last time, and specifically after getting through the first trimester and feeling pretty hopeful that I might actually stay pregnant for once, I changed a little. I started being nicer, giving them the benefit of the doubt, and treating them like the normal, good kids that they typically are, and was all around less of a hard ass. To be fair, I probably let some of them off the hook a little more easily than they deserved, but hey, I was pregnant! All was right with the world! I'm going to Disneyland!

So, as my first full-time week back concludes, I realize that some of my edge has started to return. My beautiful baby boy is 4 months old, and more importantly, he's not here at the moment, so I guess it's ok to not be oozing with love 24/7. First, the students in question DON'T SHOW UP to a REQUIRED meeting with me, then when they do, it's without the homework I specifically asked them to return with. At least I ended our time together with a wish for both to have a nice weekend. Sigh.

Maybe I just need to get pregnant again. After all, it's for the students.

I'm back, maybe?

I used this blog previously to talk about being pregnant, and now that I have a four-month old, that topic has, um, ended. Andy and I use the www.babyrowan.wordpress.com to talk about him, and since I've had little else to talk about since his birth, that was sufficient. However, now I'm thinking maybe it's time I consider using this space again to talk about other aspects of my life. It's been so long since I've posted here that I doubt anyone else will actually see this, but that's ok.

I started back to work part time 2 weeks ago, and am full-time this week. I love my job, and am glad to be back, but I do miss the kid terribly. He frequently falls asleep around 7pm, so we really only have about 2 hours with him (awake) during the work week, and that's a huge decrease from what I'm used to.

My sister was in town visiting this weekend, and it was so nice to see her. I value my relationship with her more as we get older, and it seems easier for us to connect as adults than maybe it was as kids. She's one of my closest friends, and I'm glad Rowan's birth has encouraged us to spend more time together. Another good friend, Liz, will be visiting this weekend, and I look forward to that as well.

Ok, that's enough for my first go at this for a while, but I'll try to come back soon and explore the mom and non-mom parts of my life as time and motivation allow.

Thursday's the Day!

So, I'll be admitted to the hospital at 5pm tomorrow (Wednesday), and will be induced on Thursday. I'm still kind of in shock, but am very excited! Andy will be updating everyone on a new blog he's created, BabyRowan. That will likely be where I start posting as well, though it may be a while before I get to it.

Thanks to all who've been sending prayers and well wishes our way during this long and thrilling journey:).

This is it...

Today's my last day of work until September 16. It hasn't really hit me yet, but I'm sure it will soon. I'm at 38 weeks today, and am ready for this kid to arrive any time he's ready to. Everything's still just going wonderfully, though I am regretting my last-day-of-work dress, which makes me look even bigger than I actually am. We wear purple every Friday around here (yay, school spirit), and this dress makes me look like a massive grape. Of course, Andy felt this morning was an appropriate time to take pictures "so we can remember how big you were." Thanks, sweetie.

I'm looking forward to enjoying what will likely be the last weekend of relative peace and quiet with my hubby. We'll be celebrating our 7th anniversary on Monday. I feel lucky to have him as a husband, and am glad Rowan has him as a father.

Curiouser and curiouser...

I had the BEST appointment with the nurse practitioner today. For starters, I LOST a pound since last week, which hasn't happened since I've gotten through morning sickness. Then, she tells me my group B strep test from last week came back negative, which is great news. And THEN, she checks my cervix and finds that it's halfway thinned out (effaced), and I'm dilated 1cm. This apparently doesn't mean that I'm more likely to go into labor anytime soon, but obviously the closer I can get to effaced and dilated now, the less work I'll have to do in labor later, which is good news to me. And to top it all off, she said she actually touched the top of his head, to confirm that he is fact "dropped" and in the proper position. How freaking wierd is that...Of course, Andy immediately said that HE wants to touch Rowan's head, but since he's not a trained medical professional, I politely declined his request. He'll just have to wait, like everybody else:).

Time enough?

It's interesting that I SHOULD have about four more weeks until Rowan's arrival, but I've recently started to feel the pressure to get absolutely everything done and ready just in case he decides to arrive early. My good friend and former co-worker just gave birth to her son at 37 weeks and 2 days, and she and her husband were caught a little off-guard by it. I have about 2 weeks left to work for the year (which would put me at 38 weeks), and I'm really hoping I am able to get everything done, both at work and at home, before that time.

I told Andy last night that when I get to 37 weeks, I'd really like for our house to be cleaned and kept that way until the big day arrives, whenever that is. The last thing I want to worry about as I'm going into labor is having a dirty house to greet the family that may arrive here before I have a chance to get to it. This is unfortunate for my poor husband, since much of what needs to be done would be a big challenge for me given my current limitations, so this may be accomplished through use of a cleaning service; we'll see.

I had an ultrasound 2 days ago, and the little guy is currently weighing in at around 6 lbs; they're guessing that if I make it to June 6, he'll be around 8, which would be just perfect. He's in the position he's supposed to be in (head down, facing backward), and seems ready to go. The doctor assured me that she doesn't believe he'll decide to come before my next appointment with her on May 22 (she'll be out of town next week), and I'm hoping she's right.

We had our childbirth class last Saturday, and this did really help me feel a bit more comfortable with what lies ahead for us. With the recent arrival of little Luca (friend Kristen's new arrival), we decided to go ahead and get car seat bases installed in both vehicles, packed a couple of bags (one for Rowan and one for me, of course), made the "must call" list, and bought a stroller and baby monitor, which were 2 of the last items on our list. We'll continue to take care of the last few details, and I'm hoping maybe next weekend to have time to do some cooking in advance, stuff that can be put in the freezer and thrown in the oven for those times I don't feel like cooking (which is pretty well all the time anyways).

Before long, I think this blog is going to be dedicated to the trials that come with being a new mother. I can't believe we're nearing the end of this amazing leg of the journey...

Bright Sunshiney Days

I feel happy today. Happy and secure. Happy and secure and excited. I'm sure the glorious weather we're having currently is contributing to it. My itching has not disappeared, but it's less intense and thought-consuming than it was previously. I'm definitely in the "waddling" stage, and simple movements like getting in and out of the car are more of a challenge than they've ever been. All in all though, I'm feeling healthy and content.

I had a doctor's appointment today, and will continue seeing her every week until it's go-time. I've only gained 1 lb. in the last week, so I was able to avoid the fairly frequent lectures that she dishes out. For those of you who are curious, I've gained a grand total of 37 lbs. so far. Is that really so bad? Next week, I'll have my strep B test, she'll check my cervix (I assume to see if it's starting to prepare itself for the impending event), and will have an ultrasound. THAT is the part that Andy and I are both excited about. It seems strange, but we sort of MISS Rowan. We haven't gotten to actually lay eyes on him since I was at 19 weeks, and it'll be nice to check in and see what he's up to in there.

We'll take care of a few of the final details this weekend, including things like packing a bag, purchasing a stroller and maybe a laundry hamper for the nursery, and since I'm off work tomorrow I may try to find a couple of decent nursing bras. Apparently those things come in handy. Last weekend I bought a sleep shirt and a pair of maternity sweatpants, which are wonderful. Before I was pregnant, it never would have dawned on me that my loosest normal-person clothing would someday be WAAAY too small, but yep, it's happened. I'm still relying on Andy's generosity and willingness to share his clothing, but even his stuff is too small for me to be truly cozy much of the time. I tolerate things that "fit" for work, but when I get home, I want to be swimming in my clothing.

I miss my parents. Between my Dad's recent back surgery and my certainty that I shouldn't be traveling 6 hours away from my doctor at this point, it's not feasible for us to get together, and that sucks. I last saw them at Easter, and even though we don't normally get together more than once every few months, just knowing that we CAN'T makes it harder. I know they'll come down when Rowan arrives, and as anxious as I am for him to get here, and to see them, I hope he takes his time, so Dad has plenty of heal-up time before having to make the long trip.

I also miss my sister. You out there, Amanda? Nothing wrong with your back, so feel free to visit your Evansville-bound sister whenever you can...Just kidding; my husband is more than capable of keeping me company in the absence of far-off family members. I've been thinking about the trip we took to visit her a year ago when she was living in Arizona, and I want to go back! Again, just knowing I'm stuck here makes EVERYWHERE ELSE seem pretty attractive at the moment. I'll get to leave Evansville again someday though, right? Right?!

Not too long now...

Ok, so I'm at about 33 1/2 weeks now, and I hear that 37 weeks is when I'm technically at full term, though the goal is to get to 40. I've been doing well generally, but the PUPPs stuff is back with a vengeance, and has resulted in lovely itchy rashes on my stomach, hips, and thighs. I called the dr.'s office last week when I got desperate, and they prescribed this stuff that a local pharmacy actually creates on site for such occasions. It's a mixture of lubriderm, menthol and some sort of steroid, and costs $35. We'll see if our insurance company will reimburse us. As quickly as I'm going through the stuff, it'd be great if they do, but it needed to be purchased regardless. It makes me cry at times, which is so bizarre; you wouldn't think itching would be such a serious problem, but it is with this. I'll start itching, and Andy will have the lotion in his hand, trying to give it to me, and it takes all my energy to stop scratching long enough to grab the stuff from him; totally insane, I know. I'm just glad to have a full-time job to distract me from it a little during the day.

Otherwise, I have the regular aches and pains that I've had for a while now, but they're manageable. My doctor's office has also said that taking tylenol daily is fine, as is taking benadryl (which makes me sleepy enough that I'm not spending my nights clawing at myself), so that's a good thing. I'm trying hard to remember how lucky we are to be in this place, and I know that even if the aches and the itchiness lasts until Rowan arrives (God, I hope not!!!), I can survive it. I've survived other scary medical things that haven't resulted in a bundle of joy, so I can certainly deal with this a little longer.

I read a blog this morning from a woman who's had several miscarriages and just gave birth to a healthy baby girl in the last few days, and it really inspired me, and helped me remember that in all likelihood, Rowan will be just fine, and I cannot wait for him to get here. Our nursery has all of the essentials, and just needs a few more details to be REALLY done. We'll be taking our childbirth class soon, and after that, it's just waiting a few more weeks to be done with work and ready to welcome him to our world.

Ready...for...the...summer

I cannot wait for the summer to get here. I know it will bring that huge life-changing event, the birth of our son, but I'm ready for it. I typically work til the end of May each year and am off in June and July, but since I have a few vacation days left to use before then, I'm going to make May 23 my last day of work for the year, and it cannot get here soon enough. Work is starting to be a challenge, for a few reasons. Of course, I suppose I could just be having a bad day. Regardless, I'm ready to be home for a while and out of this office.

In non-whining news, my wonderful co-workers threw me another baby shower last night, and it was a lot of fun! There was only one "game" played, and it was for me and the other pregnant guest of honor to chug a sippy cup full of pink lemonade. Not sure what the purpose was, aside from entertaining the rest of the guests, but whatever. The food was great, the presents were very nice, and I'm glad I work at a place with such thoughtful people.

My sciatic/ass pain seems to be worsening over the last couple of days, and I'm starting to wonder just how frequently I'm allowed to take Tylenol, since it really does help me to be more comfortable, especially at night. I'm starting to have, normally a couple of times a day, what the doctor thinks are Braxton-Hicks contractions, but says that as long as they're not happening more than 6x an hour, it's nothing to worry about. Maybe I've just watched too many movies, but aren't those the things that you see people going to the hospital about because they think they're in labor? What I'm feeling is definitely uncomfortable and tight-feeling at times, but nothing that would make me think I'm in labor, not that I actually know what that's going to feel like. I'm just glad to be having such regular doctor's appointments now so all of these questions get answered fairly fast. Speaking of tightness...ouch.

Weekend Happenings

I'm back in the office this morning after a great weekend spent with family and friends. My primary baby shower (hosted by my sister Amanda) was held on Saturday at my friend Lindsay's house, and my parents were in town for it as well. It was SO NICE to spend time with so many of the people we love most, including a few friends who came from quite a distance to be there. We received many very thoughtful (and practical!) gifts from everyone, and I'll be starting on thank you cards soon.

I'm at just over 29 weeks now, and Rowan makes his presence known normally at least every couple of hours, which continues to be very reassuring. There's always still that small part of me that worries about something going wrong, though we have no indication that anything will. I suppose that's pretty normal, even for people who haven't lost pregnancies previously. I'm going to attempt to not worry unless there's something to worry about, which is tough, but this time is just too precious to waste with anxiety about that which I can't control anyways.

I have another doctor's appointment this morning, and though they're frequent (every 2 weeks!) they tend to take all of 5 minutes or so. I'll post something afterwards if there's anything new learned, but I anticipate she'll tell me I'm continuing to gain weight and grow this baby with no problems. I'm seeing the 3rd of 4 doctors in the practice, and will meet the 4th at the next appointment, then will be back to my regular doctor for weekly visits beginning in mid April.

I'll be traveling at the end of this week to Louisville for a 1-day conference, and then will probably be done traveling more than an hour or so away from home until Rowan arrives. There's just some security in being 10 minutes or less away from the hospital and my doctor, and I've done all the traveling I care to do for now. Being at home more often will allow me to focus on more preparation and also more relaxation, both of which are needed in these last 2 1/2 months or so.

I go back and forth between wanting him to just get here NOW so I can see and hold him and know he's fine, and wanting him to just stay right where he is, because I know I can pretty easily keep him safe there. Once he's unleashed on the world, I'm sure that will become more of a challenge. Not that I have any say in the matter at this point; he's going to arrive when he's ready to, and we'll handle whatever is thrown our way at that point. I have a feeling it's going to be a lot of work, but also a lot of fun, and I'm excited about every bit of it:).

One of those days...

You know, it's really difficult to pull off any semblance of grace or at least appearing "pulled together," when you're as big as a house and suffering from a case of the pregnancy dum-dums. This morning I had to let myself back in my house twice after attempting to leave because of forgetting things; the first time it was the car keys, second time it was my whole purse. Yeah. My purse. Somehow I tried to leave without it.

Then, within 5 minutes of getting to work, I spilt coffee down the front of my shirt. This isn't such a huge tragedy, since I'd already determined that it's actually a little too small and the button that protects the rest of the world from having to see my oversized boobs wasn't doing a fantastic job of staying done anyways. Luckily, I live about 5 minutes from work, so I left to go home and change. Then, when I walked out the door to head back, I realized I'd forgotten the other thing I was going to grab while at home: a paper cup to pour the remainder of my coffee into when I got back to work, since I figured I might have better luck drinking out of it than the leaky thermos.

Two days ago, I ripped a small hole into the belly of another maternity shirt by catching it on the corner of a file cabinet drawer in my office. My growing gut had betrayed me once again. It's not like I have an endless supply of clothing that actually fits, you know. I certainly don't have enough that I can afford to ruin two or 3 a week.

Sigh, the rest of the day's got to get better, right?

Long time no see...

Sorry I haven't gotten around to doing this in a while! My life has seemed too busy and crazy to put my thoughts together in a coherent fashion. No guarantees that this will necessarily be coherent, but I'll give it a shot.

Things have continued to go very well with the little one I'm growing. I'm at almost 28 weeks, and still just as healthy as can be. My appetite has gone from eating small meals frequently to eating large meals frequently, but luckily, a good friend gave me a box full of her old maternity clothes, so I don't have to wear my husband's t-shirts and sweatpants (at least not out of the house). I had my glucose test (for gestational diabetes) at my last appointment, almost 2 weeks ago, and it came back normal, which is great news!!! I fully expected to have to do the more lengthy test afterward and see the "diet nazi," as apparently she's called, but luckily, all is well in that area.

I have had a couple of recent traumas, however. No need to be concerned; they're just traumas in my own mind. I recently discovered, as I was getting out of the shower, STRETCH MARKS. The problem is that I can no longer actually see my lower belly region, but there they were, staring at me in the mirror when I got out. Creepy, crawly, textured, red stretchmarks, going from my nether-regions to an inch or 2 below my belly button. I know this is an area rarely seen, but still, I was really hoping to be one of the lucky few who avoids them. I've been putting on the Palmer's every day to try to avoid them, but obviously these efforts were unsuccessful. Sigh.

The other trauma has been my recent attempt at a new hairstyle. I know, I know; I've read the stuff that says, "don't get your haircut while you're pregnant," because any sort of a big change when you're as big as a house and hormonal is just a lousy idea, not to mention the fact that most of us have stronger, healthier, shinier hair than ever before during pregnancy, and it seems like a bad idea to screw around with that. Anyways, I did, first when we were in Indianapolis last week (will talk about that in a minute), and that was my first mistake.

I went to the mall in Castleton while Andy was in his training for work, and it was more exhausting than I anticipated. I had to sit down 3 different times to rest and eat in like a 2 hour span. And when I saw the little hair salon and the opportunity to sit down for a while and let someone else pamper me, well, I jumped all over it. Those of you who know and love me, please help me remember that in the future if a hairstylist utters the word "LAYERS" to me, that's my cue to run away as quickly as possible. It looked decent the first day, of course, since she styled it, but I'm a pretty low maintenance girl. If it involves more than putting a little gel or mousse on my hands and running them through my wet hair, I'm not interested. I don't even own a blowdryer or curling iron. So, the next day, it just looked like I had cute curly hair in the front, and a long mullet/mop in the back. I got this cut on Wednesday, and by Saturday, I was back in a hairstylist's chair in Evansville trying to get it fixed...

This time, I went in just thinking they would basically lop off the extra length in the back to try to even things up a little bit. However, I was lucky/unlucky (haven't decided yet) enough to land in the chair of a very stylish woman who's been cutting hair since 1971, and she had other ideas. To make an already lengthy story a tad shorter, she took off more length all the way around, and gave me BANGS. I haven't had bangs in at least a decade, and I am clueless as to what to do with them. Same thing as before; I looked gorgeous and hip the first night, which worked out well since we were at an employee recognition dinner for Andy's work, but the next day I was clueless as to what to do with this stuff on my head. Sunday was fine; didn't pay too much attention to it since I was mostly at home relaxing anyways, but when I went to work on Monday, jeez. I swear I'm not typically a vain person! Like I said, I don't even bother to blow dry my hair, ever! But yesterday, I was so self-conscious about it all day long. I wouldn't have been more aware of my hair if I had just gotten a mohawk. Of course, all the ladies in my office commented on it, and luckily most stuck with the generic, "I love your hair!" sort of comments, but a couple stood out as more offensive than that (and please remember, we're dealing with a very pregnant brain at this point). One woman said, "It just looks so sweet..." and I wonder what exactly that means. Am I four? Another (my favorite) said, " It looks very mommy-like," and as a mother herself, if she thought for one second that's the look I was going for, she's out of her freaking mind.

So, after a very long day of enduring the comments and my own insecurities, I went home in a lousy mood. My wonderful husband took me out to dinner (I'm telling you, food is the surest way to my heart at this point), and let me whine for a while about my hair and my day. Then, after he left to go to derby practice, I spent some time in front of the mirror and played with it enough that I'm now able to convince myself that it is no longer horrible. I'm sure the little cardigan and pearls I was wearing yesterday didn't help in my desperate attempt to still look sort of young and cute instead of the frumpy social worker I'm trying to avoid becoming. Crisis averted, at least for the time being.

As I mentioned, Andy and I spent all of last week in Indianapolis where we both had trainings for work (mine for 2 days, his for 5), and we were able to spend each of our evenings there with friends we don't get to see often enough, which was absolutely lovely. I was also able to spend a day with my parents who live fairly close to where we were. The kids were on spring break here at work, so it was a perfect week to get out of the office for a while.

My next appointment is this Friday, and I'm now officially on the "every 2 weeks" cycle, and will be meeting the other 3 doctors who share the practice with mine, which I think is a great idea. After these 3 appointments/6 weeks, I'll be going in weekly. I can't believe it! I'm almost in the 3rd trimester (apparently 28 weeks is the official start to that), and Rowan will be here before we know it!!! My good friend Rachel is working on closet curtains for his room, and with the baby shower rapidly approaching, I think we're on our way to being prepared. We'll be getting carpet in the nursery next Monday, and that'll be really nice too.

I'll try not to wait a month before the next one, guys, I promise.

Crib

We bought Rowan's crib yesterday! It's a lovely cherry-colored crib and we were able to find it at about 1/2 the cost of the one we originally wanted at Babies-R-Us, so I'm just thrilled. Andy put it together last night while I went grocery shopping, and now I'm ready to do the rest of the nursery! It's so exciting, and I feel good about the fact that we're doing a lot of comparison shopping and saving for the right stuff. I'm going to go shopping with a friend soon who will be sewing curtains for our closet, and we'll start looking for some of the other odds and ends as well. It's all very exciting to me, and I'm feeling more ready all the time.

I'm still feeling fine, though I continue to struggle a bit with getting comfortable and being able to sleep. However, I'm happy and healthy and that's what counts.

Peace and Gratitude

This week has been pretty insane at work, and we've been struggling to get things done so we can have a little weekend getaway without breaking the budget. I haven't really taken the time recently to just contemplate how wonderful things are right now. It seems that the times I do get to focus on my own feelings and the miracle taking place in my body, all that I do is focus on the aches and pains, the difficulty sleeping, and the stress associated with this huge change in my life.

So, as a way to end this week with some peace and gratitude, and with keeping with my Lenten determination to exclude worry from my life as much as possible, I am taking this moment to acknowledge all the blessings in my life right now. I have a wonderful husband who's helped me to create this wonderful little boy growing inside of me. I love these two boys more than anything in the world, so much that it takes my breath away and brings tears to my eyes. I am so grateful that I and this baby both are perfectly healthy and are growing right on schedule, as we enter the 23rd week of pregnancy. I have countless family members and friends that love me and provide me with any support and encouragement I might need. I have a comfortable home that continues to be my place of solace after a long day. I have what I need in terms of food, security, and love. I have a job that fills my days with purpose. What more could I ask for?

Next week looks as though it'll be every bit as busy as this week has been, with work responsibilities that will have me at the office 2-3 evenings as well as full days. This weekend I plan to relax with some of my favorite people and I resolve to return on Sunday with recharged batteries and the strength to face whatever life throws at me, knowing how lucky I've been to have all that I do.

New Picture!

Some of you have been asking when I'm going to post a pic of my current roundness, so here you go. Unfortunately, some of the people I love most aren't close enough for me to see on a regular basis, but hopefully this will tide you over for now. Can't remember if I've mentioned this or not previously, but we don't currently have a digital camera, so this picture is courtesy of Mom and Dad, who visited this weekend. This was a great visit; we always love having them here. My dad wanted me to allow them to write "I love Aunt Amanda," on the belly for my sister, who's one of those aforementioned people who doesn't live locally, but that wouldn't be appropriate for public (or private, for that matter) viewing. My belly is still more lumpy than gorgeously round, and I'm not sure about the idea of using it as a canvas for conveying messages:).

I've been feeling pretty well; the itching has started to subside, for which I'm extremely grateful, and I swear I felt like I got elbowed in the rib this morning. Strange...my precious Rowan is getting bigger and more active all the time. I do feel like I'm continuing to lose my mind a little. I had a very restful night of sleep last night, for the first time in a while, but I think I slept almost too soundly. I got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, and my mind wandered to work, but it took me a minute to remember what I actually do for a living. Very wierd, but not altogether unpleasant...

I'm starting to feel more confident in my ability to be a good parent; I've always had confidence in my husband's abilities in this department, so that definitely helps. Andy and I were talking last night about what a special time this has been, both in our lives in general and in our marriage specifically. I feel very blessed to have him to share this with, and think that our son is quite lucky to have him as a father. There is still a lot of planning to do, and some pieces that have yet to fall into place, but I think we can do this. I'm looking forward to bringing Rowan home and showering him with love and attention. I have no doubt that it'll be the toughest and most satisfying thing I've ever done.

20 weeks!!!

I'm officially at the halfway mark in my pregnancy today! It feels like a significant milestone, just like getting to 12 weeks and the end of the first trimester did. As exciting as it is, it still seems like I have a long way to go, and actually the next 20 weeks will be, in some ways, longer than the first 20 have been. This is because even though I'm officially at 20, because of the wierd math they do, I was already at 4 when I had my positive pregnancy test, approximately 2 weeks after we conceived. So, I've only known I was pregnant for 16 weeks. It does seem though that time has started to speed up a bit. I remember how those first few weeks seemed to drag on and on and on, and that's not so much the case any more. I'm feeling good enough to just enjoy the process in general, though I worry at times that I'm growing too fast or too slowly. As of my last appointment, I had gained about 7 lbs since my first prenatal appointment, and the information I read this morning on babycenter.com says I can expect to gain about a pound a week from here on out. The doctor said I should be shooting for between 15 and 25 lbs., so at this rate I'll be slightly above that, but I guess that's not the end of the world. I'm trying to eat healthily, and am still motivated to get on the treadmill a couple of times a week, so that's something, I suppose.

I've not had to take any Benadryl or use any itch lotion for the last 36 hours or so, though I can still feel the itching slightly. I just don't want to use anything if I don't have to, and it's not unbearable currently. I've found that all the people who say how important it is to get up slowly are right; it's easy to feel dizzy and achy if I stand up too quickly, especially if I've been laying down.

Andy and I have plans with friends tonight, and will be babysitting my cousin's baby tomorrow night, which I'm really looking forward to! Have a great weekend, everyone!

Belly Drama

My body is growing and getting wierder by the day, I swear. Today's strange discovery? I noticed that for the first time when I'm standing up and looking down toward my feet, my stomach actually sticks out further than my boobs do. This is odd not because my stomach's always been so flat before (it hasn't), but because my breasts have always been, well, if I'm honest, above average in size, and I'm currently in a D cup (which is another bizarre change if you ask me), so the fact that my belly sticks out past those mammoth things is a bit disconcerting.

Sleeping on my back has become more of a challenge, and I'm forced to spend more time on my side just so I can breathe normally. I'm still itchy in the same places as before, though my chest and stomach are now also itchy at times. I feel some discomfort occasionally along my sides; I think this is because Rowan's growing a little faster than my skin can keep up with, so it feels sort of stretchy.

We haven't really made any further progress in the nursery, but it's still pretty early. I've started working on a guest list for the shower my sister's throwing for me in March, and I'm feeling less anxiety every time I look at, change or add things on my registry lists. We decided to go with a more gender-specific theme for the bedding, and I think it's going to be adorable:).

My pregnant co-worker and I are going to a breast-feeding seminar next week, which should be helpful. It's so nice to have her, as well as my friend Liz, to go through this process with! However, my heart is a little heavy today upon hearing about a friend I don't stay in quite as close of contact with who's just had a miscarriage at 14 weeks. Unfortunately, I understand all too well the pain she might be experiencing, and I just hate it. I've tried to reach out and let her know I'm available for whatever she might need, though in those moments it's hard to know what to ask for, since nothing can really make it all better anyways.

Thanks to everyone who's been consistently sending love and support our way; it doesn't go unnoticed, and makes this whole pregnancy thing even sweeter:).

Still in Shock

So, my face is still achy from all the smiling I did yesterday, and I think I spoke to just about everyone I know, which is kind of usual since I'm such a recluse much of the time. I realize I didn't put much info on here yesterday, so I'll try to catch everyone up to speed. Our son (sounds so funny to say that!), Rowan Andrew, appears to be growing, is healthy, and with no sign of any problems whatsoever. It's just feeling more real all the time, and I can't wait to bring this little guy home with us in June...

IT'S A BOY!!!

(CLick pic to enlarge!!)
That's right, you know this less than an hour after Andy and I do! Neither of us really had a preference on the gender, but it's so cool to finally know!!! I'm kind of overwhelmed right now, but will write more later when I can think straight. The important thing is that the kid looks healthy (11 oz.!) and all is well.

Indecisive

Ok, I think I'm making waaay too big a deal of this baby gift registry stuff. I keep changing my mind on stuff! I can't seem to stay decided on the crib sets, and anyways, who the hell pays $200 for 4 tiny pieces of fabric anyways?! So, I've registered at Babies-R-Us and Target, and for tonight I just need to stop. My sister convinced me to register at Target for those family members that don't live close to the other one, but many of the things I've registered aren't available in stores anyways, so I'm not convinced it'll be that much more convenient, but we'll see. I just couldn't stand the idea of having to go to another store and walk around with the little gun because it was pretty overwhelming at Babies-R-Us. Also, with the Target online registry, I can't register for some of the more generic items, like diapers. I guess people will just deal with it or buy random stuff we didn't register for, which I'm 100% okay with. It's not like I know what the hell I'm doing anyways.

Oh well. If that's the worst thing I've got going on today, I'm a pretty lucky girl.

Now we're having fun!

In the last few days, I've been feeling things that I can no longer deny are the little movements of this human I'm growing. How...cool...is...that? The more he/she moves around, and the bigger my belly gets, the easier it is to really believe that in less than 5 months, I'll be home with my husband and my brand new son/daughter. It makes me feel very, very happy and content with my life.

I'm still feeling pretty well, and am getting used to the annoyance of getting up in the middle of the night to pee, so I suppose this is good training for what I'll be facing before long when it's the cries of a child instead of my bladder and Andy's snoring keeping me awake. The only other mild inconveniences are these patches of itchy skin (on my left arm, left ankle, and both hips) that have shown up in the last few days. My nurse tells me it's nothing to worry about, but is kind of annoying.

So, this should be the last post I write where I include things like "he/she," and "son/daughter." My ultrasound is in 2 days, and you better believe I'll be posting something soon after announcing the gender of this little person. Until then, I'll be here at my desk, scratching my hips and counting down the hours:).

But it's only a tiny little person!!!

Andy and I have been very productive in the last couple of days! He had a half day off on New Year's Eve (which was a pleasant surprise for him) so we raked up the majority of the leaves in our front yard and he took down the Christmas lights. Yesterday was really cold and windy, so I'm glad we got these outside projects done the day before.

Yesterday, we got a ton of items off of our to-do list, including cleaning out closets, the basement, and a lot of stuff from the "office" to prepare for it's transformation into a nursery. We re-filed things into a compact system, instead of a bulky old file cabinet, cleaned out the bookshelves and took a lot of the stuff we don't need access to regularly to the basement and the spare bedroom, and threw bag after bag of stuff away, as well as filled a few bags with stuff we can donate. I have a feeling this tiny, little person will take up more space than we can imagine, so it's good to get started on this stuff. Our plan is to get carpeting laid in the nursery, hopefully in the next 4-6 weeks, so it was good to start getting stuff out of there. Our spare bedroom will be undergoing a transformation as well, so we've started to plan for that.

We also purchased our first item for the nursery; a changing table! This is especially exciting for my husband because it means much less work for him that we'd envisioned. We have this ancient, huge desk that I've had for probably 10 years, and I'd wanted to turn that into our changing table. This would have meant stripping off several coats of old paint, sanding, re-painting, new hardware, drawer liners, etc. I just don't like the idea of "disposable" furniture, and to me, that's what a changing table kind of is! What else can a changing table be when you no longer have kids that need changing? Not so with a desk. Anyways, as we started talking about the time and cost involved in making this piece of furniture into a different piece of futniture, I agreed that if I could find a reasonably priced changing table that I liked, I'd be willing to consider that instead. Well, after my cousin Jyl mentioned a nice consignment shop on the east side of town for baby/kid stuff, I went there, and lo and behold, I found a gorgeous dark wood changing table, modern looking with plenty of room for storage, and with a pricetag of $40. I called Andy, and said, "Sweetie, it's your lucky day..."

We'd planned on buying a dark wood-stained crib anyways, probably a convertible-style, so it can be used (hopefully) for many years to come and not look like nursery furniture, so this will match beautifully. Also, I'll be getting a rocking chair from my parents (actually the one my father bought for Mom when she was pregnant with me), and this is a dark wood-stain as well. It's starting to come together!!!

For any more recent readers who may have not been following this since the beginning, this blog was/intended to primarily focus on pregnancy- related things, and not be a summary of everything going on in my life, so if it seems like I'm only focusing on this one area, I am, but I assure you, I'm still holding down a regular job, spending quality time with friends, etc. I'm sure any of you who've been pregnant, though, know how much of a challenge it is to think about anything else when you're growing an entire person. So, anytime the baby stuff gets to be too obnoxious, feel free to stop reading, and check in via e-mail or myspace instead. If you know about this blog, it's because you know me and I love you, but I also love hearing from you, not just updating you from time to time, so stay in touch!!!